Freeing My Mind

This time I deliberately took a week off from blogging. I was a little burnt out from all the traveling and I took some time to focus on other life activities outside of internet, blogging and ministry in general. I was hoping for a little more inspiring tone come today (Monday), but my day has been a little bitter sweet. My Dad was up for a just a little over 24 hours. I don’t get to see my parents a lot, seeing as how the majority of their time is spent living in South Africa. It’s always great when I get some time to hang with them. The majority of Sunday was spent watching a varied number of football games for a total of about 5 hours or so. It was great. We also got some time to brainstorm the various ministry and business ideas that have been rattling around in both our brains. In order to help facilitate some of the fresh ideas that I have, I’ve been planning some new business ventures. My dad has spent most of his life in various businesses, mostly start-up companies. Other than the past 5 years he’s spent as a missionary in South Africa. I think I’m just now realizing just how smart he is concerning the subject. It’s funny the stages we go through when it comes to how we view our parents. As infants, they are all we know. Our literal lifesource comes from our mother and a form of Mama and Daddy are usually the first words out of our mouths. As grade school students, we still pretty much think our parents created the universe. I always thought that my Dad knew the answer to any question concerning everything from life, to spirituality, to baseball and even to the proper way to pee outside. As pre-teens and teens, we begin to think that our parents are actually the most clueless people that have ever been created. Our teenage lives, in our eyes, become all but completely disconnected from our parent’s. Although, we still depend on both their financial and housing support. As young adults, we might not really understand our parents personally all that much better, but we definitely begin to relate to their adult issues. Money, marriage, careers and the like. As I grow older and my life moves ever closer to age 30, I’m beginning to understand my parents in a way that I never have. As I realize that I’m beginning to get to an age that I actually remember my parents being at, it puts things in perspective. I’m actually coming full circle some what. I think my Dad probably does understand most things in life and being somewhat absent from my mom for a large part of that past few years has made me realize once again how much of a lifesource she still is to me. I think it’s difficult for us to truly honor our parents until we actually walk in their shoes somewhat. I’ll probably hit a whole other level of this when I become a parent myself. All in all I had a great time with my dad. That was the sweet part of the day.

The bitter part is that he came up to pack the last few items of my twin sister’s belongings. Kim and her 2 year old son, Brayden, moved up to Moravian Falls last spring both to work for Awake and to get into a fresh surrounding. I hadn’t been able to spend much time with Kim over the past few years either, seeing as how we have both lived in various parts of the world during that time. Having Kim and Brayden around for these 6 months was great for Lori and I. We haven’t actually lived in the same town as family for quite some time. About the same time that we hired Kim, Awake also encountered the most difficult financial season we have ever been through. A bit of “business” advice: You do not want financial troubles and the hiring of new staff to coincide with one another. It doesn’t work very well. As the head of a ministry, it’s tough when you have to either let people go or have difficulty with payroll. As a twin brother to a single mom, it’s much harder.

For quite some time, Kim has been struggling with some sickness that was misdiagnosed for about 2 years. After a trip to Denver to seek the medical advice of a group of doctors, they decided to put her on daily regiment of antibiotics that require an IV and little to no strenuous activity. If you have ever been around a two year old or have had one of your own, then you know that two year olds are nothing but strenuous activity. So, to my dismay Kim had to move back to Mississippi for a while to be close to her doctors as well as have to have help from my parents in taking care of little Bray. She is also scheduled for surgery in Denver around the first of December to remove a nodule from her lungs. All of my loyal readers would have my heart-felt thanks for sending some prayers her way. While my Dad’s visit was much needed, Kim’s empty house was not.

After packing up the last few things, I thought it poetic that the house smelled like biscuits and Brayden. (Two year olds also have a smell. In fact, I think all boys have a smell.) When the moving trailer was finally filled and I made one last sweep through the house, I had a moment where I knew more than ever that a certain season was over. Whether I realized it in its fullness at the time, Kim and Brayden made up a large part of our support structure during a tough time. I decided to make some biscuits late last night in honor of Kim. Me and dad ate them this morning. Kim has a thing for biscuits. In fact, it might be a problem. If you or anyone you know may have information on a support group for this condition, please comment on the blog and we’ll be in touch.

Part of the steps to recovery is understanding the dangers of your addiction. Kim, I hope our inspiration for the day will help you on the road to recovery.