Freeing My Mind

My first day of stress since the “new” me. Yet another milestone. Let me explain.

Why is it that the going theory among younger (see 20′s & 30′s) music lovers is that once a band gains some semblance of success that band is no longer accepted as “cool”? Case in point, one of my favorite bands, Coldplay.

In 2006 I saw Coldplay live for the first time, in Vancouver. To be honest, I knew that Chris Martin was married to Gwyneth Paltrow, but other than that I couldn’t tell you a single song they sang. I went with Lori and a couple of friends. They pretty much dragged me along. The opening act was Fiona Apple. If your in your late 20′s or early 30′s you might be rumaging through mid to late 90′s memories of a song called “Criminal”. I thought she was pretty out there then, but her opening act that night sealed the deal. This girl was whack. If I had any interest at all in being at the show, that act killed it. As I sat sulking in between acts, I was pretty sure the night wouldn’t get any better. Many times, in the midst of situations and atmospheres that carry a strong spiritual presence, I can sense that presence fairly easy. After Miss Apple’s act I felt a heavyness hanging over the large arena and, at the time, I figured nothing short of a mass destruction of the entire place could lift what I was feeling. Then it happened. It was as if a bomb had gone off and immediately cleansed the lingering atmosphere. It wasn’t a fire alarm clearing the arena or a “prayer” being offered by yours truly, but a sound. A sound that swept through the air amidst the roars of the screaming crowd. It was “Square One”. I didn’t know the song and I didn’t know the band, but I knew the sound. It was cleansing and pure. It might seem that I am being overly dramatic about the whole event, but it was a turning point for me. That night initiated my journey to discover God in some of the most unlikely places.

In 2006, although I was late to the party, it was still perfectly socially acceptable to not only enjoy Coldplay, but to place their bumper sticker over the E-machine logo on the back of your laptop. Not today.  It’s there notority that sank them. Shame on you Coldplay for fulfilling your dreams. We won’t stand for it.

Why do we find it so difficult to watch people fulfill their dreams? Is it that we ourselves feel so void of satisfaction pertaining to our own dreams, that we tend to only stand with people that seem to be on the same pitstop of their dream journey as us? Maybe since the first time we were cut from the basketball team in middle-school, we’ve figured it’s better to just not dream at all. Hey, disappointment can never come to somone who never hopes. Seems to me like a terrible life to live. I’m a card carrying dreamer. The lifestyle has its pros and cons for sure, but a life void of believing for something that you’ve yet to see is a life I don’t want to live.

At times, dreaming causes stress. Not in the actual moment that your dreaming, but in the day to day tasks it takes to accomplish your dreams. So, my milestone. Today was the first stressful day in quite some time. I think I’m learning how to balance the now with the yet-to-be.

And now, my inspiration for today. much love